Freedom don't come free...

It is the soldier, not the reporter,
Who has given us freedom of the press.
It is the soldier, not the poet,
Who has given us freedom of speech.
It is the soldier, not the campus organizer,
Who has given us the freedom to demonstrate.
It is the soldier,
Who salutes the flag,
Who serves beneath the flag,
And whose coffin is draped by the flag,
Who allows the protester to burn the flag.- Father D. E. O'Brian, USMC

Hospice Nursing...

I have gotten a new job, finally, and I have to say that it is not just a job, but a very definite love. I have planned on going into hospice nursing in the future, but after loosing my last job at large hospital, I had one darned of a time getting a new job. I was practically offered a RN job giving testosterone to all male clients 5 days a wk, 8 hrs a day, with an hour or more commute each way. Even though the wknds and holidays off thing was tempting, along with the pay, I just had to say no. It just didn't feeling my "caring" quota that I needed. So, after months of no hospital offers, I figured I would start looking into hospice jobs. When I called 8 hospices, all but 2 said they were hiring. I did not hear from any of them, but one that was not hiring. Within a day I had an interview, and the following day I had a "ride-along", and within 3 days of that, an interview with the CEO! I absolutely LOVED this godly woman, and we both had hearts of mercy for the dieing. This company was just so amazing. During the interview, she hired me on the spot! Wow....that has never happened in all my life! When she asked when I could start, I told her yesterday. Since it was Friday, she told me to come in on Monday to begin. And wham-bam, I started my training! It is strange compared to hospital nursing bc you work M-F, wknds and holidays off, and it pays the same as a hospital, with only 1/5 the stress!! I will work one big, and one little holiday each year, but I can live with that!! I have been going on four weeks, and I am loving it. I still have sooo much to learn, but I just feel like I have found my niche. I feel like this is where I want to be for the next 20 yrs.

And you know what they say....how time flies when you're having a good time???

Well it has zoomed by.

The fam are doing well. My hubby is much relieved to see some checks coming in...even though we're being crazy taxed bc of two incomes! The daughter has transitioned very smoothly into college, and she's still very busy helping with the homeless and being a jr high leader at our church. My boy is plugging along his sophomore yr of high school. He still works on the farm (at school) twice a wk, and getting more into biking like his dear 'ole pa. He rode his unicycle at the Halloween cyclo-cross, and was a big deal! People were darned impressed, especially since the track was muddy, and had obstacles to hop. He was dressed as an 80's DJ, and my hubby was a lumberjack.

That's it for now, though I do have a very serious prayer request. A friend from high school, wife was accidentally shot, and appears to be paralyzed from the shoulders down. Please pray for her that God will knit together the nerves and will heal this family which is devastated. Thanks so much.

"Father, hear our prayer."

cool and crispy fall leaves..

I absolutely LOVE Fall, it is my fave season of all. So yesterday was the official first day of fall. I love the cool nights, but dang there is some mean pollen attacking at night bc I am still waking up or going to bed with a terrible headache. Ya know...the older I get, the more allergies I get.

Nothing too new with me. I've been on the hunt of course, the wonderful world of the job hunt. Tomorrow I have an interview for a hospice nurse position. I am so darned excited, I could spit. It's for a full time position, and I'd have my own territory and 'team'. It sounds perfect. I've worked with hospice in the hospital and with my sister of course. It is an amazing honor and privilege to be there and help families and patients at the end. Please pray for me. I am also applying for some ICU positions as well, and will probably have a few interviews coming up for those.

Aaaaand along with that I've put on some pounds that I need to lose, which have been piling up as I try to comfort myself bc of the unemployment issue. I know a big sin for me weight-wise is the eating at night time. I have been over doing the carbs at night. So, I came up with a little plan for myself. If I am going to eat, I have to weigh myself first. It will keep me honest. So last night, I didn't do it. I need to keep doing this.... probably forever. ;0

I've also changed up my workouts at the gym. I am now doing interval training on the treadmill which is really helping me to keeping my heart rate up, and I'm adding the elliptical machine. Although....just between you and me, I suck at that thing, and I can only last about 5 min.! My friends tell me to keep with it, and I will be able to stay on it longer and longer if I just keep it up.

I don't know if I've told you before, but I am a total addict of Korean Soaps. Not soup. Not suds, but Soaps, as in day-time dramas. The one I am watching now is adorable, it is called 'The Jewel Family'. I watch it on channel 18-3 on the digital stations. It is so cute.

My family is doing fine, plugging away at various school work and activities. Have a lovely week, and again...Happy Fall!!

hello again

I know it's been way too long since I've posted, so here goes. We were busy with the end of school, and graduation. Here's my daughter in her cap n gown. Uncle Tim, Eric's brother flew in from Maryland to be here on her big day. Isn't he the best??!! The week before her graduation, we had a little grad party with her friends and some of our friends. It was so fun. Loud...but fun! That's her waving, after the big deal!


Let's see, while Uncle Tim was here, Eric took him and my boy camping. That was nice and relaxing for all. We (uncle Tim, hubby, myself, daughter and her boy friend) went and rode the big balloon at Irvine's Great Park. And of course the regular trip to Ruby's on the Pier. We were lucky enough too, for Uncle Tim to take all of us to Rainforest Cafe for a great meal. Thanks, Uncle Tim!

We took a little vacation too, but I'll expound upon that at a later date, since I've blathered on enough for today.

P.S. GOOD LUCK Kirsten, I KNOW you passed!!!

End of the school year

First of all, congrats to all my nurse friends who just graduated from nursing school!! Whooo Hoooo! Time to take some over needed naps, and actually watch TV on occasion!


(I have NO idea what this says, but I just loved those little toes!)


We've been busy around here with end of school year activities. I finally finished making daughters sr pics and announcements and mailed them out. I was very happy with them, and saved around $400.00. Can you believe it? Yeah, it's ridiculous what these company's charge, but especially that the schools endorse them. We had her award assembly, where she received that WONDERFUL scholarship! And then the senior banquet at church. Even though the tickets were $20.00 each, I am so glad we went, it was an excellent night and really marked the changes in their lives to come. (why couldn't we just do a free potluck???) Anyhoo, it was really excellent. Then on Saturday was her prom.
They had a great time at the Peterson Automotive Museum in L.A. This wk I'm getting ready for a little grad party on Saturday. It will be a simple BBQ type of party, it will be fun. I bought bubbles, water guns, Frisbees and colored chalk so the teens don't get too bored.


I am still unemployed, and haven't been searching like I should. I guess I am kind of stuck with how to phrase why I left my last job. Yeah....what the heck to say. I think I've been down since I've been carb loading like there's no tomorrow. I have really got to get myself moving on. All prayers/good thoughts are appreciated. Where the heck to go/do next? Eeeesh.

The boy has brought up his 4 D's so he doesn't lose his sheep. I am so proud of him. It is great to see him working so hard. Good job honey. He also has a new gal on his arm. Haven't met her yet, but I hear she's nice.

The hubby has been cycling as usual. Yesterday he came home full of mud bc he had crashed twice. He's so cute. He just found out that he's going to be teaching History next year after teaching 20 yrs of English! He's nervous, but also kind of excited about it. He does have a double major in History, so I think he'll end up loving it. But he has TONS of stuff from all his yrs teaching English, and nothing for History, so he'll have to start gathering new stuff. I think this may actually be an answer to prayers over the last 2 yrs concerning some really stressful stuff at work.

So...how are you?? Have a great end of spring time, and summer starts!

Crafting

So, I finally finished making my Jewelery Frame. Yes, I invented this months ago, when I was on the hunt for something to hold my jewelery. I have never really like the jewelery box idea, so I've kept them in a bunch of separate dishes, and I would just plum forget what I had. So I wanted something that displayed it all. Don't get me wrong, most of my stuff is junk jewelery, but some of it is nice. I saw someone display it all on a wall with a bunch of nails. I liked that idea, but I didn't have that much room. Somehow, I thought of a frame, where I could put a bunch of hooks, nails and wire/chain to display it all. The effort paid off. I LOVE how it turned out! What do you think? Be honest with me, I can take it! My daughter loved it and wants one, so I will make her one too. I was going for whimsical. I think I still may end up putting on some sparkly stars and a few words here and there on the wood, but mostly, it's done!

I also decided to take my daughter's senior pictures, to save @ $300 from school. They came out so well. I've picked out my two fave for you to see.

Just for fun...

Jenny, over at Everyday is a Holiday is hostesing a fun vintage swap if anyone is interested. I've already signed up, I'm so darned excited.

One great weekend...

Hi y'all, just wanted to check in to let you know that I am plugging away. I am back to the job search, this time with a better idea of what I want/don't want. I am still trying to find out where to find the geriatric jobs. I think I would love to work in one of the smaller care facilities, but they are harder to find. I am still applying for regular nursing jobs as well. In the meantime, I will sign up for flu shot nurse. It's not a career move, but it pays well enough while I'm on the hunt. I may sign up for home health also on a part-time schedule for the same reasons, plus it will keep some of my skills fresh.

This weekend was nice. I took the weekend to just breathe. I finished my embroidery project (T-towels)

for my friends birthday. It was so fun.

I made Fat Tuesday Noodles with Smoked Sausage & Shrimp yesterday. It was spicy, and absolutely yummy. My fam went to see Ironman 2 which was so much fun. So overall, a wknd to just relax, and get used to the new "place" in which I find myself.

Also this wknd our church "Left the Building". Which means, our church of a few thousand went out into the community to help with different activities/chores instead of church. They had something for every age to do. It was in the works for months, so it was well organized. So Saturday, I went to a convalescent hospital to entertain some lovelies there. We played Bingo, and sang some old songs. It was so much fun, you know I love these folks. My hubby helped clear some trails nearby, and my boy helped at a home that was falling apart. I love this concept, and would love it if they organized it twice a year.

That's it for now, how are you??

not to be a Debbie Downer, but....

I am not working at the same hospital at this time. So frustrating. I just felt like I was "getting" the time management down. I know I still have far to go, but I just felt like it will come with time. Now I will not have that opportunity.
Everyone keeps telling me that God has a plan, something better. I just want to care for others. This is what I do know, as I've been trying to sort through this:

• Must work with geriatric pts. LOVE them.
  
• Must be physical job. I can't stand a butt job.


• Would prefer a steady schedule. I was off kilter with the constantly changing schedule.


• Would like to work within team, not isolated.

So I am walking on. All prayers are appreciated, really. God is my rock, and I will still praise Him.

long time no hear...

to say I've been in the weeds is an understatement my friends.

I sprained my foot climbing a bunch of rocks at the beach (loooooong story) and missed a whole wk of work. Following that, my mom passed away, so I took another wk off. For those of you who don't know, my mom has been in and out of hospitals for the last 2 yrs with respiratory issues from her COPD and very probable emphysema. Along with that, she had alzheimers which effected her memory/mind to forget how to walk, so she ended up in bed almost 24/7 except brief times in a cardiac chair. Her days were spent staring off. On a good day we could get some responses. It was so heartbreaking. Anyway, we decided to remove her from the ventilator, and she passed a few hours later with my brother, myself and our spouses at her side.



So, it has been an extremely challenging last month. When I finally got back to work I was given two more wks of preceptoring. I know this is done, only to help me, but it is extremely challenging working with so many different preceptors, FIVE of them! They each want me to nurse in "their" way, so I have to constantly try to figure out what is wanted. I have 4 more days. My final 3 should be with a preceptor I have previously worked well with. If that all goes well, I will be on my own. So I am feeling darned overwhelmed, stressed out, and damned emotional to say the least. See why I haven't been blogging???


So..that is where I'm at. I work again tomorrow. Thank God it is the weekend which is a bit less stressful. Wish me luck!

almost Easter

and i'm going to be working. You know when you want to be a nurse that it's going to happen. Missing family holidays. Dang, it is harder than I thought it would be. Well, luckily, someone is organizing a big Easter potluck for all of us working. I am bringing a dessert. What should I bring?

Work has been tough, and I have been struggling. I have asked for the optional extra preceptor days and got them, so I have 2 extra wks to get myself more efficient. I am absolutely LOVING my patients, and the nursing process,

The charge nurses are great, and so encouraging and the preceptors have been so patient with me and my fumblings.

The kids and hubby are doing well, getting used to my new schedule as well. The boy is unicycling like crazy. The other day, he went 8 miles! The daughter is working a lot and being trained as a lead hostess. She loves her job, and has senioritis. She will graduate in just 2 months! Hubby is still riding every Saturday, and loves it.

That's it for now, nothing new to report. How are you? What are you doing on Easter??

Are you kidding??!

I thought it so funny that everyone that responded thought I was doing so well! Boy are you all wrong! I swear, I looked more "together" as a student! I am sinking! Help!!! That being said, I thank you all for supporting me. And...I know...every new nurse has told me, that they are feeling/doing the same as I. As I mentioned before, still DIEING.

Die...........eeeeen..

I have NEVER worked so hard in my life, and continue to be behind. One step forward, 3 steps back! On Friday, I worked until 10! I cannot believe I worked a 15 hr day! It's all that damn charting! It is absurd! Okay, I know it's important, but couldn't they break it down so it's one linear document, so you don't have to bounce around here then there, etc! My new preceptor is great, and VERY patient with me. I went to a full load (4) of patients and it went okay, but I was always behind, and my preceptor was picking up my slack. I was lucky too, that I didn't have any discharges or admits, or i reeeeeeally would've been behind. I am loving being with these older people, they are wonderful (well, you know, mostly), but I still have SOOOooooo much to learn.

On the other hand, it's still sooo strange to get a paycheck. I mean, I EARNED that baby, but it's still so strange. We are paying off a bunch of debt bit by bit, so I am totally thankful. As of right now, I'm working on Easter which is a drag, since I've ALWAYS been here for holidays. I knew this was coming but it is still very hard. At least I'll be home for St. Patty's Day which is big around here. Irish stew? Bread pudding? I absolutely can't stand corned beef.

Hubby and kids are doing well. K is gearing up for graduation and definitely struggling with this transition of more responsibility and the unknown. The boy is doing well and enjoying high school, and will soon be getting his goat...or sheep I can't remember. That will be loads of fun.

So...how is everyone else out there in blog land?? I am lurking at least. Have a great week, and good luck to those of you who are readying for nursing school graduation!

Finished Second week of Orientation

It was another long week, but much more hands on. My head is absolutely swimming from all the information handed to us in a packet, and competencies! I am completely OVERWHELMED! This week I will actually begin my preceptoring on the Stroke Unit. I am so impressed with the knowledge and manpower on this floor. We have a Stroke Director, Department Director, Nurse Educator, NP, PT, OT, ST, Social worker, case worker, and 2 stroke MD's who absolutely specialize, all for our little 19 bed unit! We will be moving to 35-40 beds in Aug/Sept, but still! I am feeling so nervous about starting since it's been NINE months since I've done any nursing! The other 3 new grad nurses in our unit all graduated just in December, and precepted at this hospital, so I feel like I'm the only one behind. But God is big, and will get me through!


That's it for now. It will be nice to go to nursing hours and miss the traffic a bit, but I'm not used to those 12 hr shifts that I used to do. Ah well, time to buck up! I will have one orientation day (through new grad ed) and two preceptoring days from here on out. Please pray for me, I'm so darned nervous...! I am definitely feeling rusty!

My first week as an RN...

One of my favorite moments this week was getting a work badge that said RN! Wow, so amazing! All week long we've been in orientation. A lot of useful information but driving me crazy sitting so much!! This next week, we'll get 3 days of lectures, and then 2 days at the end on our unit. Not nursing preceptoring but learning our floor, and all the other roles that make up our unit (secretary, tele tech, nursing ed, PT, OT, RT, NP etc) The only negative has been driving in horrible traffic. I am not on nursing hours so it usually takes me 45-1 hr on the way to the hospital and 1.5-2 hrs on the way home (all depending on how bad the traffic/accidents are). It's still so weird to me when I leave the hospital, that if I turn right, and drive a few blocks, there's the ocean. It shouldn't blow me away, I've grown up going to the beach, but it just being there is still so strange. Our new grad group is 14, and what a bunch of nice women...and one guy it is. That's all for now. It will be so strange to get a pay check on Thursday. How bizarre. Although NICELY bizarre.

.....my hero.

my ducks are lined up...

Well, I passed my second test yesterday that I needed to pass for Hoag...surprisingly! Dang it was a hard Pharm test. You could miss 12 questions to pass, and I missed 11, *blush* close, wasn't I?? So, I have completed the tests, took my drug screen test, and other health tests yesterday. I'm assuming I've passed all. So, I do believe they're stuck with me. Now I have to find somewhere to get a flu shot, or I have to wear a mask when caring for my bloody patients! Egad. I'll get the H1N1 tomorrow, even though I swear, I had that flu! So I have a bunch of last minute errands to get done before I start work on Monday. It will be orientation classes all next week, and start my preceptoring the following week. I am excited, and also scared *%^%$*less. Ah well, me of little faith. I'm working on it.

That's it for now, other than my 18 y.o. getting her drivers licence. And still worrying when she drives off. Though I know she's being careful, she is also easily distracted. Such a strange year this is going to be. Me, working full time for the first time in a hundred years (though nursing school totally had the same or more hours!), my daughter graduating high school, and starting college, and my baby in high school. Yup, strange year.

always the sloooooow way through...

Okay, I definitely think I should start a Dear Abby kind of column for nurses/students like myself. I swear, I always have to go the loooooooooooooong, sloooooooooooooow way around to get anywhere I'm going. And yes, I am able to totally laugh at myself....when my stomach stops cramping with stress. I do believe God is wanting to get my attention, slow me down, and make sure I'm relying on Him, and not myself. So the first time I took the EKG test, I failed one of the critical arrhythmia's. Only one. BUT....that being said, you could fail if you didn't recognize ANY of the 7 critical rhythms. Well, they are called critical because...well...well, okay, they are deadly, and if your patient had one of these, well, they could be a minute away from death. So yeah, it is RATHER important. Now I do know how important this is, it's not just a theory in a class, these are actual patients I will be taking care of so I do agree with this policy. But these EKG's on the test are REAL EKG's not text book, so I missed it. I retook it yesterday, and passed it. WHEW! I still have one more test to take, Pharm, on Monday, then I am set.

I also got a call from the other hospital that I had an interview with, that I got a second interview for the ICU job I wanted. Only 4 people from 200 were chosen to have this second interview, and 2 will get it. Yeah, the odds were pretty good. Huh. Eight months without job offers, and now, two at one time. Of course this has totally stressed me out because I have wanted an ICU job, and it's an excellent new grad program. However, I am choosing the first hospital because I LOVE the nurses there, and I LOVE patients with neuro issues, especially older folks, and I think that I will learn sooo much from these women. (there may be some guy nurses there too, but I haven't met any yet) I cannot wait to start back in patient care, I miss them! This unit is a small one, and I totally love that. What a great way to start a new career, I can't wait.

And it only took.....EIGHT bloody months! heeheee.

I have totally loved all of this torrential down pour in S CA here. The only problem is that I've had a head cold from hell, and haven't gotten to the gym in a week, and my back is sooo achy from all the inactivity. I am gonna try to go today, sick or not.

Have a lovely weekend, I hope things are blue skies and sunshine on this Saturday for you.

Thanks...

for all of your encouragement. Did you see the comment left by Stacye on the last blog? She was the one who is responsible for getting me hired! That was the nicest comment, I actually teared up. And thanks everyone for all of your support. I still have to pass two tests before I can work. I wonder what would happen if I failed it twice? Would they toss me back out into the cold hard world of unemployment??? I don't know, so I've been studying EKG's until my eyes are crossed, and I'm getting it, actually getting it! I will take the EKG test tomorrow, and then a Pharm test (that's the one that's really got me sweating!) on Friday or Monday and a health exam by a nurse. Feb. 1st I will start orientation as long as I pass those 2 tests. So I am excited, and still quite nervous until I get those tests over with.

In other news, I have a nasty, horrible, terrible, no good, very bad head cold. Yes, I am whining! And my dear daughter is taking her driving test tomorrow. She is very nervous, but I think she'll do okay. I wonder if they'll test her on the 3pt turn. We forgot to teach her that one. She's 18 so she won't have to go through the graduated (?) drivers licence. We put it off as long as we could folks. I think it was a good move, and she has never been in a big rush to get it anyway. My boy continues to grow like a weed, and is putting food away like there's no tomorrow.

How are you, fill me in!

I GOT A JOB!!!

WHOOO HOOOO!!! YAY! After just a very short 6 months, I got a call for a job offer today, and I am so derned happy I could spit!!! Not for the job I interviewed for yesterday, but the one I interviewed for a few weeks ago. The one that looked sooo promising, but didn't get. Well happily they got another opening and thought of me! These are the two women that interviewed me, where I had just too much fun. That is HIGHLY unusual for an interview, and I will need to be careful not to be toooo relaxed with them. I will be working at Hoag Hospital in the Stroke Unit. I will be starting Feb. 1st. I am a little nervous though since I have to take an EKG/Pharm test before I'm official in that department. I will sign some forms tomorrow. I am sooo happy.

P.S. I had a lovely bday, when we weren't battling our now 18 yr old. She went off and got a tattoo, KNOWING how we felt, and the consequences that would follow! So sad. That's all I can say. Parenting teens....not for the weak hearted.

Welcome 2010...plus a new P.S.

..and just let me say, it is so much easier saying twenty-ten, than two thousand and nine. Don't cha think? I never could get into the "ots", could you?

Well last you heard from me, I was crying in my non-existent beer. So what's happening these days? Of course the job hunt continues. In the mean time, I will be starting a new Home Health assignment that I am thankful for, with a little 16 mo old child with a genetic disorder. He is a beautiful baby, and I look forward to it. I have also applied to another "new-grad" nursing job. On the recording he said that if we didn't get a call it was because he was expecting around 1000 calls for these jobs. Geez, worst than cheerleading try outs in high school! But of course I applied, I like the challenge! heeeheee.

Our Christmas was a relaxed holiday for us. We stayed home and had a great day. The kids and hubby's vacay has ended, and they've gone back to school today. ahhhhh... :)

Here's a little painting I tried. It didn't scan very well though. The writing was much less noticeable in the painting. I liked how it turned out.

Went and visited my mom a few times. It kills me each time. She is so lost, and often crying out with some kind of phantom pain that we can't locate or help her with. It is so sad. Lord, hear my prayer. All your prayers are so appreciated.

My birthday is Saturday, yay. And my daughters is as well, of course. She will be turning 18! I cannot believe it. I am in total denial! And of course...those of you who have older teens...she believes on and after that "magical" day, that there are no longer any rules for her, she can do anything her little heart desires. We have been attempting to disabuse her of these lofty ideas, so she doesn't come home with frightening tattoo's and piercings, and a biker man named "Sweetums". I do believe we have some new battles coming our way. Although...honestly she's a good girl and really is seeking God daily. (but she is still battling us for the above...)

My boy is doing well, though some of his grades have dipped because of his skipping homework that doesn't interest him (poor thing), and not studying for exams ("they're easy, I don't need to!") so we are trying to "motivate" him by removing computers, etc.

That's it for now. My watercolors class ended before Christmas, and I've signed up for drawing, since I really feel like I was missing a good understanding of seeing/drawing depth, perception etc. But it doesn't start until February, so I'll work on my watercolors in the meantime. It is still ever so fun.

Have a great wintery day.

P.S. THIS JUST IN....I got a call today.... I just found out I got an interview for that new grad position, Whoooo Hoooo! Pray for me, it's on the 12th!